a few entries in jasper's journal...

Dear Journal,

Help us! We're going down! Hurricane Issac is here! Water is coming from the sky! Branches the size of elephants are falling all over the place! The wind is so strong that cars are blowing away in the wind! Thunder so loud that our ears are ringing! Aaaaaaaaa we're gonna diiieee...... it was nice knowing you.... *snob snurp... gurgle*...

I can't believe that life could be so cruel to me.....

~Jasper

Date: August, 29, 2012

Time: 3:46 PM

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Hello... I am Jasper's (very patient) mother.

I am here to warn you that My son, Jasper, is absolutely exaggerating. Being a cat, he has a terrible fear of rain, so a light mist would set him off on a spiel about 'how life could be so cruel to him'. The branches that have fallen are no bigger than him, and the wind is going 75 miles per hour but that is certainly not enough to lift a car up off the ground and into the sky- more like a bunch of loose branches on the oak trees in our yard. The thunder... is not very loud at all, and, it only started today (August 30). I myself did not hear a single crack of thunder yesterday. We are not going to die. 

~Jasper's (ever so patient) mother.

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Dear Journal, 

Well... I feel ridiculous. I didn't die. I panicked like a kitten... A very fearful kitten. At the time... I felt as if I was going to die, and I was very afraid... but, I guess I was a little off. My mother told me everything was going to be fine, and... I guess she was alright.

~(A very abashed) Jasper

Date: August, 30, 2012

Time: 1:41 PM

Writers' Block Or Laziness?

Dearest readers,
I have been lazy and I apologize for it. I would call it 'writers block' rather than laziness... but it truly is laziness. Anyway... I have been watching the rain lately. It has been raining every day now. It frightens me that such a thing as water can fall from the sky!!!! Oh, it sends shivers down my spine- being a cat, you must already know that I hate water. Unless I am drinking it...

  So, I've been listening to an array of different music lately... A few of the songs are:

Home- Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros 

Sort Of- Ingrid Michaelson

Oh! Darling- The Beatles, covered by Sara Bareilles

I hope you like them too! Mostly, the reason that I've been listening to Sara Bareilles and Ingrid Michaelson (The two last ones) Is because my mother has learned them on the piano. 

I have nothing more to say, so for now, 

Tootaloo!!

~Jasper

My Knightly Knightlyness

Good day to you!

Today, I am a valiant knight. I have saved my family from Lovebugs! They are all over the windows today! Why the windows? Anyway, I should  earn a badge... or a medal... stating;

JASPER MINER! THE VALIANT KNIGHT OF THE FAMILY TABLE!!!

KILLED SEVERAL LOVEBUGS TO SAVE HIS BELOVED FAMILY!

Don't you think it'd be nice? To have a medal for everything you did? That would be simply magnificent! I would have loads of medals! Piled up in boxes and crates, and truck-beds! I would be famous for how many medals I owned! Gadzooks... thats quite a thought. 

  But I really did save the family from Lovebugs! They were outside the window, teeth gleaming, frothing for blood- not kidding! They were roaring about and rearing back their heads! Quite a sight, really somebody should have caught a picture... But noooo! Everybody was too busy eating breakfast to snap a picture of the amazing battle I, the valiant... courageous... brave... knight of the family table.

  Humans... I swear..

  Well, I've other things to talk about... beside my wonderful knightly-ness. I know I mentioned in one of my previous posts that I mentioned a Maid.... well, I forgot to mention in That Post, that she was not a maid, but my lovely maiden.. I rested my head on her pillow many a night, and every time she woke, I stared into her maiden eyes... It is too bad that she left as soon as the family returned... I don't know why. It was quite sad really....

Well, that just about wraps it up for the day...with my maiden.. and my knightly-ness... yep. Thats about it. 

Until next time,

I bid you adieu 

how is french so fancy? I don't know.. it just is... I should learn to speak french.. anyway

Adieu 

~Jasper

Hello

Wow, I have been very busy lately.... my mother has been coughing and sneezing. She says she's sick. She also says she has headaches- I bet she's faking it.

  Today, it is very rainy. Very boring. We already had a dance party by 1:30 PM. I am so incredibly bored that I took to sitting in my cage and listening, to how many times my six-year-old-uncle and nine-year-old-aunt, ask if they can watch a movie... I mean... it is raining.

  Well, I also have been looking at videos from Simon's Cat (a youtube channel). My favorite one is 'Double Trouble' because, that is just about how I felt when that kitten, Solo stayed at our house for a while.

Thats about it for the day, I'm tired.. so I'm going to go take nap 

Yaaaaaaawn

Have a nice day!

~Jasper

I apologize greatly for my absence...

Dearest Readers,

  I am very sorry for my laziness in the past.. what... seven weeks? I really truly am sorry. Well, I shan't call it laziness... because the maid that my family hired for me, didn't let me use the computer! How unfair is that?? Hmph.
  I will get you caught up on what I've been doing for the past... seven weeks.

1. In that time I have killed one cockroach, two moths, a lizard, and four other random bugs.

2. I have eaten not a single bug in seven weeks.

3. My family left seven weeks ago and came back yesterday night, and--it is probably just a strange
human custom or a way of saying "Please forgive us for leaving you so long" but they got me a
maid! She gives me food, she pets me, she lets me sleep on her pillow, and she even cleans my
litter box! How nice is that?! not to say that my mother doesn't do any of that. But who would do it
When she is gone?

4. Sorry to say that in that whopping seven weeks, we had not a single dance party. The maid would
not allow it. So, we just sat around all day and were a normal cat and dog. It was boring.

5. I counted the cars that went by each day and added them all up. So.. in seven weeks.. a total of
four cars passed by. My mother told me today that she thought the number was a little off.
Mothers...


  There, that just about sums up the summers' events. Oh, and the best part was yesterday. Everyone
gave me and Sid a treat. All six of my family gave me one! That adds up to.... three treats!
Mother tells me that I need to work on my math skills...  Mothers...




I will post MUCH more often now!

~Jasper